Tax Day - Humor, Links, Reminders

April 15 - Tax Day in the United States. It could be worse... we could have a value added tax like some of our neighbors and then everyday would be tax day in a small way.

First, some reminders and links. If you cannot complete your forms, seek an extension, you may avoid some penalties and fees. If you are done, but cannot pay all you owe, consider filing and seeking a payment plan, but the interest on the plan is very high. If you have children and your income is below $37,100, even if you are a small business person or self-employed, you may qualify for earned income tax credit. The IRS has an online worksheet to determine if you qualify. For business, our tax guide has a great checklist of documents and last minute things to review.

Okay, some jokes. I do not claim credit for any of these and will attribute where possible.

• It has always been said that no child is so bad they cannot be used as an income tax deduction.
• A tax loophole is something that benefits the other guy. If it benefits you, it is tax reform.
• If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning, and you could only save one of them, would you go to lunch or read the paper? (remember IRS agents, I am a lawyer - so I am laughing with you not at you... please no audit)
• To err is human - and to blame it on the Government is even more so.
• Overheard at a party, "If my business gets much worse, I won't have to lie on my next tax return."
• Drive carefully. Uncle Sam needs every taxpayer he can get.
• The latest income-tax form has been greatly simplified. It consists of only three parts: (1)How much did you make last year? (2) How much have you got left? (3) Send amount listed in part 2.
• Psychiatrist to Internal Revenue agent on couch: "Nonsense! No way does everyone in the world hate you -- everyone in the US perhaps, but certainly not everyone in the world."
• Taxman by the Beatles: Now my advise for those who die. Taxman! Declare the pennies on your eyes. Taxman!
• George Harrison: "Taxman was when I first realized that even though we had started earning money, we were actually giving most of it away in taxes."
• And, finally, The Kinks:

  The tax man's taken all my dough, And left me in my stately home, Lazing on a sunny afternoon. And I can't sail my yacht, He's taken everything Ive got, All I've got's this sunny afternoon.